ADVANCED ON PURPOSEAn educational blog with purposeful content. We welcome open and polite dialogue, and expect any comments you leave to be respectful. Thanks! Archives
December 2019
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Holiday Last-Minute Gifts for Self & Others12/16/2019 5 MIN READ  The holidays are here and gift-giving activities are fast approaching. You may be ahead of the game as I’ve tried to be in past years, or you could be way behind on your gift-getting as I happen to be this year. Wherever you are on your holiday shopping, one thing is almost always certain - you didn’t include the most important person on your list, YOURSELF. So in the spirit of last-minute holiday shopping, here are some tips and suggestions as you hastily make room in your bank account and your tree for presents for the loved ones in your life, which includes you. Tip #1 Gift Yourself This time of year can be filled with stress, grief, anxiety, and busy work. Consider giving yourself a self-care gift of time, rest, and relaxation. On my Self-Care page, you’ll find gifts like:
 Tip #2 Buy a Book With so much to learn and so many stories told, why don’t we take a break from binge-watching our favorite shows and pick up a book instead! Whether you prefer audio books, reading from your Kindle, or holding a bound copy in your hand, a good book can be the needed respite from a busy life and stressful activities. In my Bookcase, you’ll find gifts like:
Books for the wonderful kids in your life include:
Tip #3 Make Something From the Heart Gone are the days when we could put our hands in some paint, stamp it on a card, write our name and “I love you!” next to it, and give that to a loved one as a gift. Or is it? We underestimate the value of a thing or work made with our hands and minds, but it continues to be one of the most thoughtful, personal gifts that we can give to someone. Here are just a few examples of gifts that I’ve seen people give as gifts, consider what makes sense for you and try something out of your comfort zone! 
 Poetry, short story, or other writing. I’ve done this for my partner, my Mom, and friends over time. This can be a poem typed and framed, or a printed book of short writings. You don't have to write something new if you have pieces folks have never seen before, bring something out of your treasure chest and make it shine with pretty font on fresh paper!  Arts and crafts of any kind. When was the last time you’ve gone inside Michael’s or Joann’s? My bestie Gina is a fantastic scrapbooker and she also makes dreamy ribbons and bows. My long-time friend Amparo (aka Apple) makes incredible gifts from the heart through crochet. If you check out Apple’s Instagram you’ll get some great ideas for crocheting, or you can reach out to the queen yourself for a special order! Tip #4 There is No Perfect Gift, Just Thoughtful Ones At the end of the day, let’s try to remember that it isn’t about how much money you spend, or if you even expect a gift from this person in return. It’s about what makes you grateful for having this person in your life, and the most natural, cost-effective way for you to show her or him that gratitude. To my Mother, my partner Michael, my grandma Trining, my cousins Janella, Melinda, Justin (may you rest in peace), Evita, Cristine & Mikey (and my second cousins Nate, Jon, and Lizzie), Cassandra & Matt, Dalton, Anna, my aunts and uncles Hedy & Ben, Hanny & Howard, Joel (aka Manoy), Elenore & Bernie, and family spread throughout the Philippines, US, Australia, and elsewhere, I’m thankful everyday to have you in my life and to be part of this beautiful, multi-cultural family! To my best friends Lara, Gina, Erin, Meo, Serei, SJ, Roy, Alerie & Rod, and friends all over the world, I’m grateful for you! To my mentors Dwayne, Sr. Susan, Kevin, Elroy, and so many more that have touched my life, thank you for your wisdom, your well-intentioned feedback, your selfless coaching, and your positive vibes. To you readers out there, I’m so thankful that you read whatever you read on my website, and I hope you have a blessed and joyful holiday season with your loved ones! About Author: Meredith "Mer" CurryMer has always had a passion for education and helping historically underrepresented groups achieve access and success to higher opportunities. She has consulted nonprofits, educational institutions, and businesses in addition to her volunteerism and mentorship of students.
Learn more about Mer at www.meredithcurry.com.
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Defining Your Strengths as a Leader10/28/2019 4 MIN READ  This article is the 1st in a series on "Breaking Knowledge Barriers". This article is the 1st in a series on "Defining Your Strengths as a Leader" I have read my fair share of what some might term “self-help” books. I like to think of them as “self-awaken” books. The “help” part in “self-help” alludes to something being broken that needs fixing. What I appreciate about the books I’ve read since I was little, as well as today, is that self-awaken books point to the strengths, potential, and inner wisdom deep inside of us, already alive and ready, yet often untapped and tucked away hidden from sight. This wisdom manifests as skills and intuition, and I’m keen on developing my ability to tap this wisdom. Self-evaluation is critical for me as a leader, as a manager of teams and projects, and as a woman of color. The Center for Creative Leadership reminds us in their report 7 Emerging Trends for Transformative Leaders that some managers may struggle with interpersonal relationships, affecting their ability to build and lead teams or adapt to change, which can lead to career derailment. To avoid this, “organizations must design programs that develop [managers’] self-awareness, political savviness, communication skills, and ability to influence others...skills that are essential to effectively heading a team.”
As a professional, whether you are an employee of a company or an entrepreneur, understanding your strengths and skill sets is key to building the confidence, resourcefulness, and grit to adapt to any situation. As human beings who have way more going on than just our jobs, you can bet that your personal, educational, emotional, societal, cultural, economical, and religious identities are often at play when you negotiate professional situations. Most of us do not know how these identities manifest themselves in our decisions, risk tolerance, and self-reliance. Most of us have comrades and loved ones we can turn to for advice and feedback, but our hearing is often screening and interpreting with the bias of that relationship and all of its power dynamics. So why take a personality assessment? Because we often don’t know the questions to ask. And even if we did, would we really answer honestly, free of unconscious bias, shame, guilt, regret, or fear? Define Your Strengths as a Leader Activity Take out a pad of post-its, ideally in two different colors (e.g. green and yellow). Find a blank wall or space where you can lay out two sets of post-its and set aside a total of one hour.
We know from the Council of National Psychological Associations for the Advancement of Ethnic Minority Interests “Test bias is a primary issue of selecting and using testing and assessment instruments with racial/ethnic minority groups. Past research has shown that tests can produce misleading results with culturally different groups in terms of slope and intercept (or unfairness) bias.” Thus, if you are a person of color, you will need an assessment that will address and consider this intersection of your identity, as well as many others, if you are to feel good about doing anything at all with the results. I’d like to give you a review of a few assessments because, 1) I have taken them in more than one sitting or format, and 2) I have heard from and worked with others who have taken one or a combination of assessments as part of developing themselves professionally at work. I have written a separate blog post for each assessment in this "Defining Your Strengths as a Leader" series. Click here to go to Assessment #1 on DiSC. Related articles
About Author: Meredith "Mer" CurryMer has always had a passion for education and helping historically underrepresented groups achieve access and success to higher opportunities. She has consulted nonprofits, educational institutions, and businesses in addition to her volunteerism and mentorship of students.
Learn more about Mer at www.meredithcurry.com.
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4 MIN READ  This article is the 5th and final one in a series. Read the introduction article: "Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Womxn of Color in the Workplace." If you Acknowledge who you are, Accept the strengths and challenges in front of you, and develop a risk tolerance to Adapt to situations as they come, you’re in a pretty good place. But let’s go back to the first question that I had to ask myself - What Can I Give Up? This is why I say, Finish Strong. Finish whatever is holding you back with strength. This might be just what you need to move forward on something else. Be intentional about finishing whatever it is, and focus on ending it with a lesson to validate the effort.
spreadsheets and trade them in for Quickbooks Self-Employed or something:
Once you know the owner, size, and the priority of this project you want to START, you can rumble with vulnerability as the great Brené Brown advises in Dare to Lead. You can let go of the need for this project to look and feel a certain way if you’re going to delegate it. You can let go of the anxiety of thinking about it right now if you know it’s not going to come up again for several weeks. I bet you will also realize that you have mad delegation and prioritization skills as well!  Lastly, Back Yourself Up by building a strong bench of people that you can rely on to support you. If you can set up a formal advisory or committee, awesome. If you can find a mentor, wonderful. If you can join a community like a local commission or network like the Women’s Networking Alliance or the Asian Pacific American Leadership Institute, way to step it up! The most important part is getting positive reinforcement and honest guidance from outside of yourself, while also building your inner monologue of positive vibes and affirmations. And whenever possible, build a diverse bench. It should have people that look like you and people that don’t look like you. It should have people that will agree with you on some things and people who will disagree with you on some things. Stack your bench with people who will look out for your best interest, which is not the same as Yes-people.
You now have all of the strategies you need to begin to tackle any knowledge barriers or general challenges you may have face as a woman in business, education, law, medicine, etc. You already have the will and the grit to move forward; you only need to take the first step. Know that I believe in you and that I am taking those steps with you. Sincerely, Mer Related articles
About Author: Meredith "Mer" CurryMer has always had a passion for education and helping historically underrepresented groups achieve access and success to higher opportunities. She has consulted nonprofits, educational institutions, and businesses in addition to her volunteerism and mentorship of students.
Learn more about Mer at www.meredithcurry.com.
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3 MIN 30 SEC READ  This article is the 4th in a series. Read the introduction article: "Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Womxn of Color in the Workplace." How many of us are still making decisions today because of something that happened a month ago? A failure a year ago? A mistake or misjudgment a relationship ago? Instead, I recommend, “Be open to learning new lessons, even if they contradict the lessons you learned yesterday.” Our intersections, our identities, are chock full of lessons we learned yesterday that we are still holding onto. They might be holding us back and we may mistakenly think they’re pushing us forward. ACKNOWLEDGE who you are, how your identities intersect and play out in your everyday. How your heritage/history, education, geography, and income all impact the access you have to the knowledge you seek today. You acknowledge that the path behind you and in front of you is rife with challenges and misjudgment and misunderstanding. So who are YOU today, and what strengths and skills do you have in your toolbox to move forward from this moment?
That is to ask yourself what are you GOOD at, what are your strengths, and how does that play out in your life. Conversely, what does it look like when you are not applying those strengths in your life, and how do they manifest as fears or you getting in your own way or your unhappiness?
 ADAPT by starting from a place of strength in the knowledge of who you are and gratitude for all that you have ACHIEVED to get to this moment, rather than shame or regret. There’s a TED Talk on the 5 Top Indicators for Startup Success by Bill Gross with Idealab, and chief of them is Timing, followed by Team, Idea, Business Model, and Funding. What this tells us is that Timing is the largest factor in the success of any business, so it behooves you to always be present, open-minded, and have a fresh perspective and confidence to tackle whatever comes, when it decides to come, because we have very little control over timing. RECALL YOUR STRENGTHS and let them nourish and remind you that you can do it, whatever IT is, when the time comes. Now it's time for you to finish strong and start fresh, and we teach you how to do this with our final strategy. Click here to go to Strategy #4. Related articles
About Author: Meredith "Mer" CurryMer has always had a passion for education and helping historically underrepresented groups achieve access and success to higher opportunities. She has consulted nonprofits, educational institutions, and businesses in addition to her volunteerism and mentorship of students.
Learn more about Mer at www.meredithcurry.com.
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2 MIN READ  This article is the 3rd in a series. Read the introduction article: "Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Womxn of Color in the Workplace." No matter how old we are, how successful we are, how much we’ve achieved, who loves us and who is loved by us, there are challenges that we still face as individuals. I believe that our experiences and identities can tell us a lot about WHY. Identity Intersections explore how issues of race, sexual orientation, and mental health intersect with one another (Psychology Today). We are unique in how we identify with our identities, and how those intersect to create our experience, value systems, and personalities. It is healthy and critical to acknowledge and accept your intersections as contributing factors to your success as well as challenges. It is valuable and worth your energy to assess how these play out in your decision making, management, and principles. Often, we don’t even realize that our intersections bias our perceptions not just of others, but ourselves and what we are capable of or deserving of. The two images below offer a few combinations of identities that you can reflect on
Please understand that the outcomes of this strategy will vary depending on the person as we are all different. It is important to take what you need and let go of what you do not. Throughout your life journey, your Identities Map may look a little different given that you will change. You may have to re-identify yourself and that is just fine because change is inevitable. This next strategy in this series will help you embrace it. Related articles
About Author: Meredith "Mer" CurryMer has always had a passion for education and helping historically underrepresented groups achieve access and success to higher opportunities. She has consulted nonprofits, educational institutions, and businesses in addition to her volunteerism and mentorship of students.
Learn more about Mer at www.meredithcurry.com.
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2 MIN READ  This article is the 2nd in a series. Read the introduction article: "Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Womxn of Color in the Workplace." The Journal of Positive Psychology published a study in June showing that 15 minutes of meditation has the same effects as a full day of vacation. One step into a mindfulness or meditation practice is to practice breathing exercises. Mindful breathing is an incredible, free, readily accessible tool to help you recall the strategies I share with you throughout my Blog.. Next time you’re facing your shame, take some deep breaths. When you have a small win to celebrate, take some deep breaths. Appreciate who you are. Take a precious moment for yourself. Practice Diaphragmatic Breathing aka Belly Breathing or Abdominal Breathing. As part of meditation practice, breathing exercises are known to help manage the symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome, depression and anxiety, sleeplessness, and more. Breathing leads to a CALM MIND, and with a calm mind, you are more equipped to respond with authenticity, armed with your natural strengths and intuition.
Lastly, another benefit of breathing and lowering your heart rate and stress levels, is so that you can activate KINDNESS more. More for yourself. More for others. More for the world. Consider a free app like UCLA Mindful by the UCLA Bedari Kindness Institute (recently highlighted in LA Times!).
"Your calm mind is the ultimate weapon against your challenges." ~ Bryant McGill Now that you have learned how to relax and be mindful, you will have enough energy to pursue Strategy #2 on Identifying Yourself. Trust, it is never easy to look at "the [womxn] in the mirror." Related articles
About Author: Meredith "Mer" CurryMer has always had a passion for education and helping historically underrepresented groups achieve access and success to higher opportunities. She has consulted nonprofits, educational institutions, and businesses in addition to her volunteerism and mentorship of students.
Learn more about Mer at www.meredithcurry.com.
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5 MIN READ  This article is the 1st in a series on "Breaking Knowledge Barriers". I have had the opportunity to work for some amazing visionaries and leaders in Southern and Northern California. I landed some of my first jobs out of college thanks to the help of staffing agencies who liked that I could type over 100 words per minute, knew ten-key, had loads of customer service experience, and was visibly eager to make a difference somewhere. As I grew in skills, roles, and responsibilities, I watched myself stretch and reveled in the expansion that can only happen when you’re granted the opportunities to. My supervisors were pretty good at spotting my drive, resilience, growth mindset, risk tolerance, and desire to learn as much as I could. After being an Executive Assistant, Office Manager, Accounting Coordinator, Program Specialist, Grant Writer, and then Executive Director, I found my passion and strengths as an operations executive. With that passion, I helped start a statewide nonprofit that supports over 15% of California’s public 6th-12th graders with college and career planning tools, and I’ve consulted with multiple nonprofits and leaders to help them achieve their visions. The moral of this short story for me is that every step of the way, when I had the opportunity to bet on myself, I did and often, I won. What I skipped in the story are the massive mistakes, failures, misperceptions, wrong assumptions, and poor leadership that I had to struggle through in order to get new roles, take on new responsibilities, and absorb new skills. If this sounds anything like your own journey, then perhaps like me, you also had to navigate strong bouts of insecurity, depression, loneliness, codependency, nagging self-doubt, and creeping suspicion of everyone and everything. If this sounds like you, then I invite you to keep reading. 
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And then they grew into:
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Until finally, they reverberated in my heart and soul into a thundering:
Hearing myself tell myself what I needed was so powerful, I still shiver just thinking about it.
- I need to give up my need to be anything other than who I am, right now, in this very moment.
- I need to give up my need for something more than what I have, when I have so much to be grateful for, right now, in this place, as I am in this very moment.
Hearing myself tell myself what I needed was so powerful, I still shiver just thinking about it.
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"What Can I Give Up" Activity
Check out my “What Can I Give Up?” Activity that I often share with my clients to help them figure out how to let go of certain things holding them back in their lives. I show a personal example of my use of SMART Goals to create actionable steps towards giving up a specific habit. Included is a free printable for you to do the activity as well. Enjoy! |
Do you watch Parks and Recreation? If so, then this moment of realization for me was like Leslie Knope owning, “I am big enough to admit I am often inspired by myself.” In this moment of telling myself that I was enough, that I didn’t need to be anything more, that I wasn’t something broken that needed fixing, I tuned into who I was again - someone with love and compassion who can inspire the best in others. I had just gone so long without aiming my strengths at myself.
I continue to learn from this lesson, to break it up into smaller chunks, to dig deep into the nuances of my needs. I have some take-aways that I want to share with you as strategies for leadership development and self-care. This is aimed at entrepreneurs, managers, and those who run businesses, teams, and projects. But really, these strategies are relevant to anyone who is struggling with a leadership challenge in their personal or professional life. I have written a separate blog post for each strategy in this "Breaking Knowledge Barriers" series. Click here to go to Strategy #1 on Practicing Mindfulness.
Related articles
- Article 1: Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Womxn of Color in the Workplace.
- Article 2: Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Strategy #1 Practice Mindfulness.
- Article 3: Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Strategy #2 Roll Call! Identify Yourself.
- Article 4: Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Strategy #3 Acknowledge. Accept. Adapt.
- Article 5: Breaking Knowledge Barriers Series: Strategy #4 Finish Strong. Start Fresh.
About Author: Meredith "Mer" Curry
Mer has always had a passion for education and helping historically underrepresented groups achieve access and success to higher opportunities. She has consulted nonprofits, educational institutions, and businesses in addition to her volunteerism and mentorship of students.
Learn more about Mer at www.meredithcurry.com.
Learn more about Mer at www.meredithcurry.com.
